OPINION: Fear will find you, so let it fuel you

By David Gomez Jr.
Editor-in-chief
Published Friday, May 5, 2023

As I type away this opinion column between our staff’s managing editor and interns on the row of Macs in our office, I realize this is something I’ve always wanted. It’s a shame it comes at the end of my time at this university.

The paragraph you just read was written two days ago. This opinion piece will be written with a new mindset and for the better—the theme is fear.

I must admit I am taking inspiration from Kendrick Lamar’s song “Fear” because it is a powerful song, and lately, that’s what I’ve been feeling while I type away on this laptop on my kitchen table.

I fear earning my degree will be for nothing. I fear I gave up so much quality time with friends and family for a career I’ve been dreaming of. A career that, up until a year ago, I never would have thought possible I’d ever write in. Let alone take photographs for too. 

I fear my family will look down on me, as many families tend to do when their child’s degree is not in medicine, engineering, business or criminal justice. I’ve already been asked by countless people what careers I can attain with my liberal arts degree in communication.

It gets old faster than a bouquet of roses from Walmart.

Speaking of things getting old, so are my parents. I don’t want that to come off as mean as it reads, but I want them to see me do something incredible with the choices I’ve made that led me here. I fear they won’t enjoy the fruits of my labor as I pay them back in vacations or memorable birthday parties—something along those lines where I get to pay them back for everything they did for me.

I feared letting my sister down as she guided me through every piece of information I needed to hand over and ensure my finances were in order.

It must have been difficult to watch me wander aimlessly for a chunk of my adult life.

I fear taking another job where I’m undervalued or, worse, don’t see myself a part of. I am a team player and can fit into any role. That’s for damn sure.

When it comes to my friends, I fear the social life I’ve sacrificed has been for nothing. I miss making memories and strong bonds with all of them. I want to visit my friend in New York, which I have put off for two years.

I fear failing my professors, who taught me their best—day in and day out. I want to make them proud.

I fear being compared to a certain family member who never achieved much with his life and constantly asked for favors and help.

I fear being a burden because I know I am capable of so much. If the last four years have taught me anything, it’s that I can muster my way through and can thrive on chaos.

I regret all of my niece’s events I had to miss, and fear it was for nothing.

I fear the crashed car, lost job, missed dating opportunities, tears for family members since passed, extra cash, a year without a job and accumulated student debt will have been for nothing.

I fear this student paper will continue to be overlooked as much as my adviser Instructional Associate Professor T. Rob Brown. He deserves a hefty raise and tons of praise, not just from the department, but all of Texas A&M International University, for bringing back Lazarus and adding ethics and professionalism to the student paper. With more than 20 years of experience in journalism, y’all are out of your mind if you do not let him run his own program dedicated to it. And only journalism.

Students need a voice on campus and the Student Government Association isn’t for everyone.

Lastly, I fear disappointing my mom. She seriously is George Bailey from “It’s a Wonderful Life” and I would love nothing more than for all of Laredo to celebrate her and advance her $25,000. Haha. I love you, mom.

Thank you to all The Bridge staff I have worked alongside for putting up with my leadership. It was never easy, but y’all made it easier for me. Thank you so much.

And thank you, TAMIU, for a huge kick in the ass that only life’s struggles could match. 

I wanted to be bitter about this place as I left, but I never could.

“I love you, all. Class dismissed.”